Who'd be the mother of sons today? From aggressive toddler to football hooligans some sons are letting themselves and their families down all over the place.
Once upon a time giving your husband a son was the ultimate female achievement. Daughters were an expensive encumbrance and today female infanticide is still a feature of many developing countries.
But in the western world attitudes are changing.
The War Against Boys, The Trouble With Boys, Raising Cain are among a clutch of books recently appearing on our shelves, all with one apparent claim - slugs and snails and puppy dogs tails are indeed what little boys are made of.
The clear message is that sons need a large injection of sugar and spice if they are to survive in today's post-feminist era.
The evidence of a woman's world is all around us. Girls are doing better in school than boys; boys are more likely to be suspended from school, to leave without a qualification and find it harder to get a job.
More boys than girls bully and are bullied and are prone to risky behaviour such as drinking, smoking and illegal drug-taking, (though the gender gap is narrowing here).
But while many parents seek to toughen up their sons in order to fit them for a male, competitive world, research on male infants shows they need more, not less, tenderness than their sisters.
The gender gap begins in the cradle, with boys less sensitive to mother's face and more prone to separation anxiety than girls.
Up to age one, boys explore more, while girls are more people-oriented. Small boys develop manual dexterity more slowly, are less talkative, (their brain language centres take longer to develop) and need more help with social skills.
As we've always suspected, boys have 30 percent more muscle bulk, more red blood cells and a tendency to impulsive bursts of activity.
Accordingly, little boys can be an uneasy mix of sensitivity and swagger, needing a firm yet gentle hand.
Emotional needs
But psychologist Doctor Michael Hardiman says that many parents offer the opposite.
"Little boys are seen by parents as being more alert and independent and by implication as having fewer emotional needs than infant girls," he says.
"Ironically, when little boys themselves are studied, they are, in fact, more needy, cry for longer periods on average and experience higher anxiety levels faster when left alone."
A mother's vision of what it means to be a boy may influence her response. So Joe gets away with much more than Joanna. Mom may smile indulgently when he pushes the boundaries, thereby reinforcing his assertiveness.
She reacts more slowly when he cries and so begins his training in a lifelong lesson that male vulnerability is not allowed. He must suppress and control his feelings.
"Perhaps the greatest wound one can inflict on any human being is to punish them for their feelings so that these feelings disappear," says Hardiman.
Being brave
He is the author of Ordinary Heroes, a new self-development book for men. His research leads him in the belief that parents pass on three main expectations to their male offspring.
Sons are expected to sacrifice themselves in terms of ideals and feelings, to provide for and protect women, and to be defined by their achievements.
"The message that many fathers give to sons is that life is not about relationships, it is about success, achievement and being brave," he says.
"What fathers have done over the centuries is to teach their sons to gird their loins, to learn to suffer pain, to stay away from experiences that soften the heart, to fight, to be better than others and to succeed.
"When sons cannot aspire to these lessons they develop a sense of failure that can haunt them for the rest of their lives."
Rearing kids solo
But, even Dr Hardiman is quick to point out that "so-called experts don't have all the solutions ... and to pretend we do, tends to make scapegoats of parents and make them feel guilty.
Bringing up children is difficult these days because of the world we live in, the forces and influences that children are exposed to, and the implications this has for how they turn out.
"I think too, we should be mindful of those very many parents rearing children solo. Perhaps single mothers can find some caring males, uncles or a grandpa to offer a positive male role model," he says.
"The first thing that jumps out to me when thinking of sons is that boys need a different educational environment from girls. They are more movement-orientated, less verbal and may be faring less well today in an education system which has become more feminised in its approach to learning.
"So male energy can build up as in a pressure cooker and they burst out needing to discharge it.
"Most boys in the age group from seven to 10 develop relationships through shared activity rather than by sitting and talking.
"Historically, boys bonded with their father through shared tasks, leading to an indirect communication system which worked well. These days we expect dad to act the role of mother while he has a perfectly valid role of his own."
Bond is precious
So, be active together in a way that interests you both. It could be fishing or playing computer games or cultivating a patch of garden together.
"The kind of bond offered by doing things together at younger ages has a real value in adolescence," he says.
"Teenagers no longer want to be seen doing things with their oul' fella, but if there is bond, your son won't want to act in a way that would lose Dad's respect because it is precious to him.
"Spending time together in pre-adolesence is an important building block.''
The letting-go that mothers have to do with sons can seem very brutal, he says.
"They may still seem so much part of you, you can be tempted to hold on longer. But don't be too over-protective. He's got to cut the cord and become himself, this is vital to his self-esteem."
Not that Mum is redundant, far from it.
"He needs to accept the challenge of life and to go to the frontier, but while he is out there doing his thing, his mother is the source of a lot of his nourishment.
"It's a magical feeling for a boy to look back and see his mother's eyes smiling at him in approval.
"See him as a separate being, wonder who this child is becoming. This will help awaken you to the sense of mystery and adventure that parenting involves."