Try to stay with me, this will be a quick and confusing lesson on Audi hierarchy. For today we'll focus on Audi A4.
At the bottom of the pyramid you'll find the common-or-garden A4 with a 1.8-litre turbo engine. Because it's an "Attraction" model its seats are covered in the finest velour the German cost-cutting department could source and amenities such as cruise control and auto-dimming mirrors are left dangling like a carrot on the other side of the salesman's desk.
The tier system then moves up through "Ambition" and "Ambiente" models, in that order, until another, more powerful engine option picks up where the previous one leaves off.
The prices and standard items get higher with every rung of the ladder, all the while picking up extras such as leather, fancy colour screens and all-wheel drive until the range arrives at very suave six-cylinder models packed with backlit buttons and electronic gizmos.
Enter S4. See those polished silver mirrors? They signify the start of a new tier system. I think connoisseur's probably too strong a word for its expected customers but they're certainly not the office-cubicle lunch-run type.
Just like its V8 forebear, the S4 you see here was created to satisfy a hole in the market occupied by motoring enthusiasts craving something a little different. Something with a little more zest than standard All Gold tomato sauce but not quite willing to live with Bushman's Revenge 15-out-of-10 chilli sauce on an everyday basis.
Under the bonnet there's a supercharged three-litre V6 very similar to the 3.0 TFSI recently launched in the bigger A6 range but, in this application, tuned to deliver a claimed 245kW and 440Nm.
With this kind of power it's clear to see that the S4 was built to tango with BMW's twin-turbo 335i down the autobahn and home in time for tea. Our acceleration test results indicate that a drag race would require a photo-finish as the Beem is a heartbeat quicker to 100km/h (5.4) and just pips the quarter-mile.
The Audi delivers its power with authority and putting foot in exactly the right rev-range sends this biggish sedan forward like a pro wrestler off the ropes.
Because of its forced induction, acceleration is quite unlike that of the previous 4.2-litre, V8 S4 and, where that car's displacement and cylinder advantage saw it thumping ahead effortlessly, the new version is a little more highly strung.
The supercharger whine is always quite evident and the compressed air, once processed, is exhaled from the tailpipes with enough pressure to make pedestrians in the vicinity a little nervous.
EYEBROW-RAISING THUMPS
The new S4 is available with either a six-speed manual or seven-speed S tronic semi-automatic transmission and, although I haven't yet sampled the manual version, I'd recommend it anyway.
The S tronic is somewhat flawed here despite being of DSG-style dual-clutch layout. It comes across as indecisive and just won't make up its mind about which gear to be in when coming to a stop or slow crawl.
Hard acceleration often resulted in eyebrow-raising thumps as the transmission finally decided with a definitive - "Yes! That's the gear! Now let's go!"
I am, however pleased to announce that I experienced none of the "limp mode" issues encountered by colleague Minesh Bhagaloo and other motoring journalists at the S4's media launch.
Not that I didn't try.
GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS
Our test facility's mountain stage is a serious "not for sissies" circuit and even a series of full-throttle, then airborne, then hard on the anchors laps failed to evoke the car's failsafe control unit settings.
The S4's trim specification is virtually identical to its top-of-the-line but non-silver-mirrored counterpart the A4 3.2 with leather upholstery, cruise control and rain-sensing wipers.
The good news is that the S4 gets must-have LED headlights and sports seats as standard but the bad news is you'll still have to fork out R21 300 for navigation, R9400 for the Bang & Olufsen sound system, R4200 for parking sensors and R9100 if you want the bucketier "S" sports seats. And that's not the half of it.
I also wish the S4 came a little more dressed for the occasion. It does have special bumpers, a small lip spoiler and, of course, those silver mirrors but just a sprinkle more spice would go down a treat.
I'm thinking of the 2006 A4 DTM edition with hints of carbon-fibre here and there and a set of red-painted tow-hooks.
VERDICT
Yes, I know, it's not an RS4. But please don't miss the point: the S4 is for the enthusiast, not the weekend track-day racer.
The RS4 is the king of the A4 mountain, Bushman's Revenge 15-out-of-10 chilli sauce. The S4 is a comfortable, practical and realistic four-door sports sedan with a little more pep in its step than standard-issue A4s.
Just take a look at those performance figures again. - INL Motoring
AUDI S4 SPECIFICATIONS
ENGINE
Cylinders:
V6.
Capacity:
2995cc.
Fuel system:
Fuel-injection with supercharger.
Max power/torque:
245kW at 5500rpm/440Nm at 2900-5300rpm.
TRANSMISSION
Type:
Seven-speed S tronic semi-automatic, front-wheel drive.
SUSPENSION
Front/rear:
Five-link with upper and lower wishbones and tubular anti-roll bar / Independent trapezoidal link with anti-roll bar.
STEERING
Type:
Power-assisted rack-and-pinion.
Steering-column adjustment:
Height and reach.
BRAKES
Front/rear:
Ventilated discs front and rear with anti-lock and stability control system.
WHEELS/TYRES
Rims:
18" spoked alloy.
Tyres:
245/40 radials.
DIMENSIONS/WEIGHT
Length:
4717mm.
Width:
1826mm.
Height:
1406mm.
Mass:
1685kg.
FUEL TANK/CONSUMPTION
64 litres/11.3 litres/100km.
250km/h (Gauteng altitude).
ACCELERATION
0-100km/h:
5.6sec (Gauteng altitude).
STANDARD EQUIPMENT
Key-fob central locking, xenon-plus headlights, trip data computer, aircon, power windows and mirrors, sports seats with power adjustment, S sports suspension, cruise control, colour display, multifunction steering wheel.
SAFETY EQUIPMENT
Six crash bags, electronic stability programme, anti-lock brakes.
MANUFACTURER SUPPORT
Two-year unlimited distance warranty, five-year or 100 000km maintenance plan.
SERVICE INTERVALS
15 000km or when service indicator cries "Enough!"
PRICE
R597 500.
RIVALS
BMW 335i Steptronic(225kW and 400Nm) - R512 900
Mercedes-Benz C350 Elegance 7G-Tronic(200kW and 350Nm) - R471 000