For the petrolheads among us, the Gillette M3 razor ad on TV is sacrilege. There's only one M3, cousins, and it doesn't earn its keep trimming bristles.
To insinuate that BMW's iconic M3 sports saloon is like something that mere mortals (yes, even David Beckham) use to shave is horrifying.
Every M3 ever made has classic-car status as the ultimate expression of the company's best-selling 3 Series.
But it seem like forever since the Bavarian boys unleashed an M3. We're told 2007 is the year for the four-litre, V8 M3, and it will no doubt wear the badge proudly.
Which leads me to my second, maybe more serious, thought. How quick will the new M3 really be and will it be worth the high price tag that it will no doubt carry?
I pose the question not in light of competition from Audi's RS4 or the upcoming Merc C63 but because there is a serious challenge to the M3 from within BMW's own stable - the 335i Coupé.
Now I'm not one for clichés but the whole "wolf in sheep's clothing" thing has no clearer meaning than in this model.
Perhaps "sheep" is a little unfair: this is, after all, the latest 3 Series two-door, with heavy emphasis by its maker on "special body lines, the graphic design of the headlights, the structure and design of the rear lights, the interior, and even the exterior mirrors".
The reality, however, is that if you pull up next to one on the highway, or even near Checkers in Emmarentia, there's no way you'd expect to find a 225kW, 400Nm twin-turbo, straight six under the bonnet.
And since when was BMW into turbos? It has always been the company's boast that its exquisite engineering of high-performance engines was the ultimate in power extraction using natural aspiration.
Fact of the matter is, after all these years Beemer has shown it remembers how turbo technology in petrol engines works - to startled glances from RS and AMG rivals who have monopolised the turbo and supercharger market for too long.
And the 335i has not one, but two turbos. Why? Most who have driven a turbo will be familiar with the term "lag".
It can best be described as a hole in the power delivery, a time when you wait for enough pressure for the boost to kick in, and it can make pulling away from an intersection embarrassing - or downright dangerous.
Each of the 335's two turbochargers supplies compressed air to three cylinders, building up pressure much faster than a single, large turbo and eliminating even the slightest turbo lag while allowing the engine to spin all the way to 7000rpm.
The turbochargers are made of heat-resistant material, making them immune to high exhaust gas temperatures, while further innovations include high-precision fuel injection and an all-aluminium crankcase.
Tar delivery
Translated into the currency we love, tar delivery is unquestionable. There isn't the slightest hint of lag; the 335i launches and holds boost consistently through every gear, and does so quietly and efficiently, wondering what the fuss is all about.
The fuss, actually, is that second gear gets you comfortably past the 100km/h mark and into the mid-five-second bracket.
To give you some comparison of how quick this car is, sister publication Star Motoring tested the six-speed, automatic derivative at Gerotek military proving ground near Pretoria.
The 335i automatic transmission is also something of a groundbreaker - I suspect because BMW's SMG technology was debatable at best.
It claims the response time of the new auto box is down by approximately 40 percent compared to a conventional automatic transmission, with shift time almost halved.
Quicker than the current M3
BMW quotes a 0-100km/h time of 5.5sec - obviously in optimal conditions, great weather, and at sea level. Our colleagues got 5.6 at Gerotek, making the car slightly quicker than the current M3.
Which brings me back to my initial question - will the new M3 will be so much better than the 335i that it will justify spending the difference, bearing in mind the manual 335i costs less than R500 000?
Sure, the M3 will probably sound and handle better, and will no doubt look like a "wolf ", but will it reach 100km/h in convincingly less than five seconds, and will it be two car-lengths ahead of a 335i on a quarter mile?
I hope it is, but for now I can confidently say this is the fastest all-round piece of machinery you can buy for R500 000, and that, I feel, is an enviable title to have.