With the Lotus Elise being so low, compounded by a high door sill, it takes some practice to enter the car without looking like a sack of mielies falling from a truck.
Climbing out of that low-slung seat is even trickier and there's no way to do it gracefully. Mini-skirted women will just have to stay in the car until they're sure nobody is watching.
Once you're plugged into the Elise's snug bucket seat and driving through a fast set of sweeps, however, concerns about the practicalities of ingress and egress fade as quickly as the loyalties of floor-crossing politicians.
The Elise has a ride firm enough to dislodge teeth fillings, it's as noisy as a hurricane and it's about as impractical a car as you can get but drive it at speed through a mountain pass or on a racetrack and the reason for its existence becomes all too clear: its for purists, pared of unnecessary weight, designed for being fun to drive.
Lotus occupies a unique position in the sports car world. While other automakers concentrated on squeezing maximum power from their big engines the British firm started by racing innovator Colin Chapman has always been more concerned with power-to-weight ratios and the way its cars handle.
This philosophy has over the years created legends such as the Lotus 7, the Esprit and now the Elise. The 10-year-old Elise has been available in South Africa for some time in limited numbers but the Lotus brand has now been taken over by Bentley and Tata importer Pearl Automotive, a division of the Imperial Group, which has been able to price the car a bit cheaper.
I use the term loosely as the basic Elise sells for R375 000 while the faster and higher-specced 111R version tested here goes for R480 000.
Exclusivity is guaranteed: only 36 Elises will be imported to South Africa this year.
The Elise 111R tips the scales at only 860kg, thanks to its aluminium chassis and composite body, so its a featherweight against roadsters such as the BMW Z4 and Porsche Boxster which each weigh more than 1300kg.
The mid-mounted engine behind the 111R's cockpit
is Toyota's high-revving, four-cylinder, 1.8-litre VVT-i (variable valve timing - intelligent) unit that powers the RunX RSi. It's good for 141kW and is hooked to a Toyota six-speed manual gearbox.
A 1.8 might seem pedestrian for a sports car but, because the Elise is so light, ti has the power-to-weight ratio of far more powerful machines wearing Italian or German badging.
Truth is, that screamer of a Toyota engine has found a perfect home in the lightweight Elise. It takes little effort to rev it into its power zone, where there's a turbo-like boost at just more than 6000rpm that lasts until 8000rpm when a warning light flickers to remind you to change gear.
No track limitations
When that engine's on song the Elise feels every bit the true sports car, with a lusty forward shove and even lustier holler. Lotus claims it will scoot from rest to 100km/h in only 5.2sesc at sea level and reach a top speed of 241km/h.
Many cars handle well through a mountain pass but have their limitations exposed on a track. Not the Elise. It thrives in an environment of constant direction changes and hard braking as we found out during a few laps around Zwartkops.
The centre of gravity is low and body roll is virtually non-existent. The aluminium chassis gives no hint of flex so driving the Elise an almost kart- like experience.
With that direct, non power-assisted steering the car can be hustled through sharp turns with the accuracy of a golf ball through a Kreepy Crauly hose. The grip is outstanding and it takes extreme cornering to unstick the tyres.
One way to get it sideways in a hurry however - as with any mid-engined, rear-wheel drive car - is a mid-corner throttle lift.
Traction control is absent in this purist sports car though all-disc anti-lock brakes are standard and really stop with intent.
The Elise is a very visceral experience; loud and livid and uncomfortable. The seat's hard, the engine makes a rumbustious noise, the steering's direct and firm, and the gearshift is stiff (though very precise).
Forget your cellphone
Your body must be young and fit to take the pounding of that stiff suspension. On a bumpy road it feels like you're sitting on a jackhammer - and forget playing a CD because it will skip continuously.
Wind noise, with the thin soft top up or down, adds to the cacophony so don't even bother trying to talk on a cellphone while driving. Installing the manual soft-top roof is a clumsy chore compared to the push-button electric roofs of rivals such as the Audi TT and BMW Z4.
Though only 3.7m long, the two-seater roadster has a powerful presence that reminds you of a mini Lamborghini. It has enough slats and air scoops to rival a fighter plane.
The cabin is mostly exposed aluminium, bare of any weight-adding upholstery. The only embellishments are the suede-covered fascia and red leather bucket seats.
Very hard leather bucket seats. I can dig the minimalism and I think cupholders are overrated but a couple of storage nooks would have been welcome as the only place to stash your bits and pieces is an open tray beneath the dash in which contents slide around noisily.
Not all is super basic; the windows are powere-operated and there's a sound system and remote-operated central locking. A token boot resides behind the engine but it's so tiny you may as well send your luggage via carrier pigeon.
Summary
For similar money you could buy a German roadster such as a BMW Z4 or Audi TT with similar performance and four times more luxury and convenience.
The Elise is motoring stripped to its bare essentials for the pure thrill of driving, a toy for gymkhanas and racetracks for petrol-in-the-veins enthusiasts who dream of chequered flags. - Star Motoring
- Test car from Lotus SA