Victims of colourism sometimes try to overcompensate for what they perceive as a lack, by over-achieving in other aspects of their lives Rakhi Beekrum
Even though colourism has its roots in slavery, sadly it persists, despite progression in so many aspects of our lives.
Perhaps the most heart-breaking reality about colourism is that it often begins at home. Our self-esteem starts to develop in early childhood, where our experiences shape our beliefs about ourselves.
When a child is teased, ostracised and made fun of because of some aspect of their appearance, they may internalise this and start to view themselves as being deficient, unworthy or unlovable.
Most of us have either personally been victims of or witnessed colourism growing up – manifested as name-calling, exclusion, discriminatory “jokes”, seeing lighter skinned siblings and peers being given preferential treatment and negative comments about skin colour.
Colourism is often intra-racial. Internalising discriminatory messages about ourselves can negatively impact one’s mental health – leaving one feeling unlovable and unworthy – and can contribute to mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. This can persist into adulthood.
The presence or absence of protective factors can mediate the impact of colourism on mental health. If someone who was a victim of colourism was raised in an otherwise supportive environment, being validated and reminded of their positive attributes and made to feel valued, this would have likely served as a protective factor against the development of mental illness.
Our support systems and coping skills can serve a protective role in the presence of discrimination. However, many victims of colourism may never have had anyone take a stand for them and stop this discrimination in its tracks. The trauma of not feeling emotionally safe can contribute to emotional distress.
Victims of colourism sometimes try to overcompensate for what they perceive as a lack, by over-achieving in other aspects of their lives. This can often lead to anxiety. The poor self image is noticeable in the proliferation of skin lightening products and treatments.
In the age of social media, there is even more negative social comparison as we are bombarded with so-called “beauty standards”.
Social media has also intensified bullying, as perpetrators feel safe behind a keyboard; discriminatory posts can go viral easily and it’s difficult to remove oneself from triggering posts.
If you are a victim of cyber-bullying, do not rush to retaliate or engage. Bullies want a reaction, so it’s best to not impulsively respond.
You can take screenshots and decide how to act after you have processed the hurt. Remind yourself that such comments say more about the bully. It can be hard not to take it personally, but remind yourself that it’s a reflection of the poster or commentor.
Do not immerse yourself in reading offensive comments. Seek support, either from your loved ones who help you feel validated – or professional help, if indicated. Report the bullying on the relevant platform.
As a society, we need to stop equating physical appearance with self worth. Start by replacing compliments about physical attributes to complimenting others about positive attributes, such as kindness, patience, resilience, empathy, etc.
Those who have benefited due to being lighter skinned also need to call out colourism when they see it. Do this by not accepting preferential treatment and by taking a stand when you do see someone being discriminated against.
We need to become aware of what our strengths are. Surround yourself with people who are good for your mental health. Above all, love your body for all it does to keep you alive.
Rakhi Beekrum is a counselling psychologist in Durban North with more than 14 years’ experience in individual and couples therapy. Her expert advice has been featured in print and digital media, on radio and television. She uses her social media platforms to spread mental health awareness and to reduce the stigma.