My stomach danced the flamenco and my navel rolled. Oh Lord, would I survive? I shut my eyes and counted sheep. But the sheep were swimming. I hadn't realised sheep could swim.
And then God spoke: "Stick this patch behind your ear and this shall pass." And yea, it came to pass.
Well, God in this case turned out to be the ship's doctor and I must admit, for the rest of the week, although his name was Helmut, in my eyes, was a hero for the little patch worked and within half an hour, the queasiness had gone.
A hellish beginning turned into a week of paradise as we sailed in the good ship Deutschland from the Philippines around the island of Borneo to Bali.
The cruise aboard had started in Manila, a frenetic city with 10 million inhabitants chatting away in incomprehensible Tagalag.
The ship had organised a day tour and so we visited the Intramuros walled city built by the Spaniards, the Malacang Palace, the Pambata Museum and Fort Santiago. Then came lunch at the gracious Manila Hotel where George Patten had stayed during World War 2.
The island of Borneo, the third largest in the world, is divided by Malaysia, Indonesia and Brunei and it was past the northern Malaysian and North Eastern Kalimantan - to give it its Indonesian name - that we sailed, stopping at the Sepilok, the oldest orangutan rehabilitation centre in the world.
The Kabili-Sepilok Forest reserve is home to the last wild orangutans and we were privileged to see these great apes swinging through the rain forests.
These forests, still rich with tropical plants, grasses and tall trees have not been threatened by the ubiquitous logging of the Malaysians, and thankfully, this piece of heaven is still preserved.
Unless you have actually stood face to face with an orangutan, you cannot imagine what a handsome, human-like creature it is, hence its local name of "person of the forest".
Later that night, on board, while sailing the Sulu Sea, it occurred to me that the wild creatures on land were far more attractive than many of the passengers cavorting to the music in the lounge. But then again, I'd been enchanted by the tropical ambience of Kalimantan.
This was the ultimate holiday. Sleeping in a cabin fit for a queen, being served European or Asian cuisine - whatever my choice - sunbathing at the pool (though we did have to fight off feisty Germans) visiting the comprehensive library, meeting like-minded people in pleasant surroundings and then stepping ashore to visit yet another interesting destination. Some passengers disembarked for three-day overland tours, but I stayed with the ship.
Because this was a German ship, the entertainment was Eurocentric and truly classy, opera instead of rock, ballet instead of Walt Disney.
That said, when we partied at night, we stayed up until the early hours, enjoying midnight feasts laid out on the pool deck. The age group aboard was mixed which meant the fossil passengers could retire earlier, while the younger ones had a jol.
By the time we reached Bali, I'd befriended a swinging Italian doctor, an interesting American air force pilot and an Argentinean tango dancer and we decided to forego the ship's tours and instead, do our own thing.
We hired a four-by-four and set off into the interior. It was exactly the right thing to do because as we abandoned the tourist-clogged villages along the coastline, we discovered a gentle, unspoilt Bali of quiet villages, green fields and deep blue lakes and pristine forests with not a tourist to be seen.
Was it the right decision to cruise instead of fly to each destination? Definitely. The comfort of the ship, the pleasure of falling asleep at one place and waking at another, the joy of having familiar surroundings yet the excitement of visiting exotic destinations, was, for me, the ideal way to travel.
When the cruise ended in Bali I admit I was sad and wished I'd been on the deck waving goodbye as the Deutschland sailed to other exciting places.
- The Deutschland is a Peter Deilmann cruise ship and you can find out information about the ships routing from the South African sales agents Development Promotions, tel: 011-339-4865.